If the Butthole Surfers had ever done a ton of PCP and decided that Glassjaw wasn’t extreme enough, they would have been rolodex darko and their debut EP would be Vulnavia.

Which is probably the highest compliment I can pay them.

This isn’t the kind of record that will appeal to everyone. You will either get it instantly and wonder where this band has been your entire life, or you will instantly turn it off after the first few seconds of opening track Princess, and jump into the nearest shower in an attempt to scrub yourself clean with industrial bleach.

Fortunately for me, I fall heavily into the first category.

There is no rhyme or reason to Vulnavia. For example, the EP is six tracks long, but cannot clock in at over 13 minutes. One of the tracks, What’s the Ugliest Part of Your Body, is just an acapella piece. Admittedly one that manages to twist into an ugly nightmare before its 46-second runtime is over, but acapella nonetheless.

Final track Watermelon Song sounds like the B-52s pre-Love Shack, when they were still good, and features a guest appearance by Cancer Bats vocalist Liam Cormier, who explains that the reason he is on the track is that rolodex darko ran out of guitar solos.

Which is, quite frankly, fucking brilliant.

The rest? The rest is a beautiful wall of noise that sounds like it might fall apart at any point and yet manages to hold itself together in such a spectacular way that it is breathtaking.

And talking of breathtaking.

Vocalist Roberta “Bob” Stan is a force of fucking nature. One minute screaming at the world like a woman who isn’t just on the edge, but has quite happily stepped over the bastard thing and set everything behind her on fire, the next singing with a precision and tone that makes you wonder how the same voice can live inside one human.

Don’t think this is a simple one-woman show, however, as the rest of rolodex darko are just as possessed as their singer.

From drumming that sounds as if it has set a personal mission to register on the Richter scale, to bass that has more soul and funk in its little finger than a busload of Fleas, to guitars that tear at your flesh one minute before applying a soothing balm to the wound they just inflicted upon you the next.

And that is the crux of Vulnavia. It is the kind of record that seems to be trying to murder you one minute and the next, it’s taking you out to dinner. It is so fucking far out there that it’s not only in a different time zone, but a different galaxy. A galaxy made of white noise and the screams of the damned, but one you would quite happily visit.

If you have any interest in extreme music then you owe it to yourself to check out Vulnavia when it is released on October 31st.

Just don’t be surprised if it ducks out of the restroom window when the check shows up.